#And I'm like

[prokrastinartiya]

micro continuation of the previous picture :)

[uselessgaywhovian]

sorry, saw someone on reddit talking about how they "had" to kill shadowheart because they were playing a "good" character and she was "evil" and i'm like

not to make her too much of a little meow meow, but this little bitch wants to be good so much that Shar had to put a shock collar on her when she was like seven and like 40 years later it's still not working great

[eyeofthebrainstorm]

There's something very compelling to me about how Vax and Vex are the Apollo/Artemis trope with a twist. Vex is a huntress and she uses bow and arrows, but while Artemis is goddess of the moon and chaste, Vex is very sensual and ends up under the protection of the sun god. Vax is a theater kid and he's charming, with that main character energy and poetic destiny. But unlike Apollo he's dark and connected to shadows and death. He's also very devoted to a woman who will eventually become a tree.

[eiswolfzero]

🫣

[hel7l7]

I'm too forgiving. I know.

[imminent-danger-came]

Monkey MK: "There's something inside you, that you can't control. You know what you are, deep down. A beast, a monster—harbinger of chaos! This thing, that wants to hurt, that wants to destroy, that wants chaos! You're so terrified to let it out! But the truth is, you like it. It makes you feel strong. It's who you are!"

(5x04 The Storm Within)

-

Nine: "No, I told you, I get out either way! But, I have had enough of control, enough of watching people put themselves in cages! Of...watching them push away the chaos, when the chaos is what makes them who they are!"

(5x09 Sacrifice)

-

*sweats*

[sneebl]

proud hater of the relationship hierarchy

[shanastoryteller]

siat ch 33 progress report: 5k

[theoriginalsapphic]

if the plan in season 4 was to:

save max

2. clear eddie's name

3. and defeat vecna

...i would say they failed miserably.

[diedbydeth]

rant about proshipping because it's 1 am and i can't sleep and i can't find a good fucking fanfiction website and i'm just so fucking sick of everything.

just to preface this i'm not an "anti". just anti-leaning. i'm shipcourse unaligned because i find this type of discourse really pointless and anger inducing. like why the fuck do i have to tell grown ass adults (i'm literally not joking there are people in their fucking forties believing this shit) that shipping a child and their dad is not ok. like what.

ok preface done. now the rant.

i find all of proshitters' takes on stuff really weird. like what do you mean fiction doesn't affect reality? if fiction doesn't affect really, then how the fuck did the january 6 riots happen? i can assure you that the reason they were there was not because there was actual election fraud. if fiction doesn't affect reality, then queer and racial representation in fiction doesn't matter. like people realize that, right? or am i just out of my mind? clearly you can understand how pedophilia and incest in fiction can affect people if you can understand how representation of minorities in fiction can affect people. there can't possibly be people that dense, right? even aside from children and minors reading that shit, pedophiles reading it can make them consider not getting help for their paraphilia and just jacking off to the porn you oh-so-graciously have given them. like does that not make you uncomfortable beyond words?

or their other argument saying that people shouldn't care what others ship? like am i overreacting to be incredibly uncomfortable around people who actively ship minors and adults? why do people even do that in the first place? don't give me that coping mechanism crap, there are *much* more better and efficient coping mechanisms than writing about pedophilia, like writing about the feelings you felt or talking about it with someone. i went through something very similar, but i didn't have to write pedophilic shit and post it on ao3, so why would you have to?

like you are harming people with this crap. you are giving predators something to hide behind. you are giving people who draw problematic things, not even related to weird ships (like people who draw racist and other bigoted things), something to hide behind. you are giving creeps a platform and ultimately helping them in getting their behavior normalized. do you not see the problem with this?

do i, a teenager, need to tell an adult, a person in their mid-forties, that condoning pedophilia and incest, even fictional, is problematic?

rant over. feel free to send death threats or try to tell me to support creeps in the replies or even my askbox. or don't. your choice.

[kevinsdsy]

haven't written a long fic in like half a decade (which is insane in itself) but it's quite literally sending me how my study habits, which my friends always make fun of, are also shown in my writing habits because how have i not finished writing the 2nd chapter yet and i'm already working on chapter 3 like ?? 😭

[thelonelyshore-if]

I think that perhaps when I was born I was cursed by a witch to always write way too much.

[ineffablebookgirl]

It's always funny when I see a Good Omens post that mentions Michael, and I have that beat or two of genuinely not knowing whether they mean the angel Michael or Michael Sheen, 10/10 cognitive dissonance experience, love that shit.

[oonajaeadira]

Please send Pedros. Either that, or come hear my tale of whoa and laugh at me.

be me

SO at the cabin, don't know when he's gonna be home

take my favorite vibrating thingamabob and go into the bedroom to have some alone activities

can see the back gate from the bed, can hear if he drives up the driveway (back alley), must be in the yard to see into our bedroom

alone activities are not always quiet activities

finishing up and hear the gate open SEE the gate open

that was weird, didn't hear SO's truck

jump off the bed and get into the shower

(in this house alone activities are not crossed with partnered activities for reasons)

shower

get out of shower and welcome the SO home from the cabin.

"hey, do you know when [friend] is coming over?" i ask (friend is coming over today for help with some recording with SO and graphic design with me but we haven't set a time)

him "she was just here."

"WHAT"

him "she was in the studiogarage."

"she was just WAITING?"

him "yeah."

"i was HOME. and she didn't come to the door?"

him "why are you so mad about this?"

"is she there now???"

him "no, we did the recording and she left."

!!!!

"but...I was supposed to help her with her designs! did you know she was coming?"

him "yeah, she texted me."

"AND YOU DIDN'T THINK IT WAS IMPORTANT TO TELL ME WHAT TIME SHE WAS COMING BY?"

him "it's not a big deal..."

"dude I was MASTURBATING."

him "oh. OH...."

"YEAH, DUDE"

in conclusion.

3 people learned a valuable lesson today about communication.

[nilboxes]

Anon who asked about Ratio getting seriously hurt. Thank you for the very detailed answer! Was very pleasantly surprised by the sweet treat :) If it's okay, can I ask how deep you think Aventurine's greed for Ratio could go?

Fathomless.

Aventurine himself cannot quantify just how deep this greed and desire for Veritas goes. It permeates his very being, so much that it's such a part of him. He knows it's always there like his own bodily organs, the back of his palm, the breath in his lungs, the feeling is very much at home, it's so familiar sometimes he doesn't quite notices it. He can still desire other things, but the hunger he has for Veritas runs far and deep.

A gambler wants a lot of things after all. I wrote in the drabble collection fic Nemo Saltat Sobrius how he found inspiration from the Scholar King. This greed and desire definitely built over time. I imagine in his early days in the IPC, prior to becoming the Stoneheart Aventurine, he finally has enough personal freedom to go try all sorts of things. He eats all kinds of cuisines, shops, goes around Pier Point, does little side trips when his assignments take him off Pier Point, sleeps around with flings. It fast becomes empty, but he finds comfort in the Scholar King lectures he puts on when he feels particularly in need of some company for encouragement.

An image of Dr Veritas Ratio forms in his mind, the Scholar King. He still has goals here at this time, he still thinks he has a chance to make a difference for his people and those who've helped him. He strives, he perseveres, not quite alone because he's got the Scholar King on his side.

He collects images of the Scholar King, at first it is because he believed it brought him luck, but then for lack of friends (his Sigonian eyes and his commodity code spell trouble for a lot of people) he finds some companionship in the little Scholar King figurines he collects. (He buys them online and even then they aren't plenty) He also starts to learn more about the Scholar King, Dr Veritas Ratio, he reads the articles, watches the biographies, the documentaries about him, sees the rare pictures of him without that alabaster head. He thinks, how beautiful.

It is when he becomes Aventurine that things take a downturn. His fondness for the Scholar King becomes obsession. Since learning his people are gone and those who helped him cannot be reached, the deep and sudden meaninglessness must have hit him hard. I imagine he would have held on to his inspiration and found some strength to go on because of the Scholar King's teachings about finding one's own purpose in life.

Still, the reality is crushing. He clings harder, he buys an actual life-sized statue of Dr Veritas Ratio, his Scholar King, it keeps him going. He fantasizes about this beautiful man and starts to imagine all sorts of scenarios with this Scholar King. It's a defense mechanism, to imagine, to be taken away to another reality, to hope. The Scholar King in his head is not enough, he needs the real one, the Dr Veritas Ratio.

So he does what he's good at, he schemes, he makes little nudges in the Technology Department and in extension the Intelligentsia Guild, just introducing them to this very talented person in this corner of the cosmos, it is the tiniest nudges, here and there. He cannot really wait but he doesn't want to nudge too hard, and eventually that invitation letter gets sent, and it's thanks to Aventurine's luck it finds Ratio at the most opportune time.

When he sees Ratio he can't help himself, every sense of propriety is melted away by the yearning, the hunger. Ratio is every bit as beautiful in the candid photos taken without his headgear. The real Scholar King is now accessible to him, the one built in his mind is was just a projection, Aventurine knows this well, and it's easier for him to separate that version with this living breathing one he has a chance to come to know now, and he wants to know everything about Ratio. He does this in the manner only a worldly, materialistic man knows how, to touch, to feel, to consume and consume. He doesn't have to have expectations about what Ratio would be like, the Scholar King was nothing but a construct in his mind, he just wanted the man in his entirety to be in front of him.

Aventurine's greed-filled desire is marked with intense looks, harsh nips of teeth, torrid hands that itches to grasp tight and never let go. He never really thinks too hard about why he's come to harbor these feelings for a man he doesn't really know, he hasn't even truly met, but the greed persists. There's no logic behind simply wanting, one can desire things simply because, and that's true here for him. He rides these feelings, unsure where it will take them, and surprisingly Veritas reciprocates in some manner. The greediness persists, even when it is being fed, he always just wants more and more of Ratio, he cannot get enough, he will never get enough, because he's obsessed.

The entire train of thoughts only appear to be healthy and sane because Aventurine wants so, so many things, most of them contradictory, like wanting Veritas all to himself but also wanting the world to see how brilliant he is, that it cancels back to balance. There is a strong desire to fully possess Veritas but he also doesn't want it, because that would mean taking away what makes Veritas who he is. So Aventurine is at a standstill with his own endless insatiable greed and lets it be, feeds it with what he can get, what is best for the person who matters the most to him, and it's not enough but it needs to be, but it's still never enough. The thoughts could make him dizzy if he traces it too much, so he makes it simple, so long as his darling Veritas is within his reach, it is enough.